morning...

once too often, the never ending marathon of thoughts running through my mind wake me up early in the morning...well that's what happened to me a few moments ago...here i am, yawning my way through 6am, but can't seem to get a good sleep. i think i was thinking bout something, and when i began to online, i saw what i was thinking about. well, not bad eh to have things i want. but then things are not always the way i want it to be...

to see someone i like the first thing i wake up really freshens me alot! it gave a whole new kind of strength no other caffein can do the job, but it is a lot more addictive than a cup of coffee, or a can of coke. they say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but i'd say absence makes the heart grow heavier. the intensity of emotions that i always go through is unpredictable and it's much more stronger nowadays...that means i'm a lot more moody than before...i get so sensitive at times and only yesterday i got my mood contolled by comments so hurtful at that time, but it was just some lame i-know-it-all comment otherwise.

i never knew liking someone will be this difficult...emotions running high...sensitivity running high...depression seeping in...sleepless nights...and the neverending wait...but i'll never wish to have this emotions taken away. someone once told me that bad or good emotions, we'll have to enjoy every moment of it. if not, we are just the same as the dead. quite true, isn't it?

i wonder why am i feeling so negative about this thing? maybe because i know that i'm just being naive? hoping that someday she'll realize? that won't happen for sure. if someone were to realize something out of the blue, then i won't need to be studying anymore. i won't need to seek knowledge anymore...but deep down inside, i really hope she'll realize. oh well...here goes my mood blast again...it's good morning for me, and good night for her...